Ice Dancer

banner by FrozenSoldier

ICE DANCER

Vancouver, Canada … 2010 Winter Olympics

“Please, please, please, please.” I bounced on the cushion next to my brother, begging him with everything I had. “Please, Emmett, won’t you go with me? Please?”

“No, no, no, no.” He kept flipping through the Men’s Fitness magazine that he’d seemingly pulled out of thin air. “No, Alice, I won’t go with you. No.”

“Aw, come on,” I moaned. “It’s only for a couple hours.”

He wouldn’t look at me, the rat bastard. “Get Edward to go with you.”

“Can’t. He’s too busy mooning over Bella at the media center,” I grumbled. “Dad’s on call at the luge track and Mom wants to go with him. She said she’d go with me, but I don’t think she wants to. I know you don’t have plans.”

He finally closed the magazine and gave me his full attention. “Pipsqueak, I may not have plans set in stone, but that does not mean I want to spend an afternoon at the Olympics watching ice dancing practice. Ice dancing is boring. If it were the competition, maybe I’d take you. Why do you want to go to practice anyway?”

“The Hales are practicing this afternoon,” I answered simply – it was enough explanation for me.

“Don’t know who they are,” Emmett said. “But I’m getting the idea that you’re going to pester me until I give in, so fine, let’s go.”

I squealed and leapt off the sofa, snatching my boots, coat, and bag in one quick swoop. “Thank you, Em, you won’t regret this. I promise.”

“Whatever,” he said, locking the door behind us after I’d danced out. “But if you skip all the way there, I’m pretending like I don’t know you.”

I linked my arm through his to keep myself from skipping. On the walk to the ice arena, I chattered away about the ice dancing competition. Emmett wasn’t listening, but that never stopped me from talking. I had my reasons for being desperate to see the Hales, the US ice dancing national champions, practice for their original dance; the main one being my massive crush on Jasper Hale. I knew Emmett would thank me for making him come once he saw Jasper’s twin sister. He’d be an ice dancing fanatic in no time.

When we got to the arena, I pulled Emmett as close to the ice as we were allowed and plopped into a chair.

“I’m gonna kill Edward for mooning over Bella instead of coming here,” Emmett muttered morosely in the chair next to me. “He won’t even ask her out, the idiot.”

“We can’t all be as nutty and outgoing as you,” I giggled. “Now be quiet and watch, unless you want to ask me what’s going on. You need to pay attention.”

His only answer was to roll his eyes.

The American teams were sharing the ice with the Lithuanian teams. Tanya Varniene and Demetri Kazlauskas were evil in my opinion; they’d won the last two world titles, the most recent time in a hotly debate defeat of the Hales after the Americans had led through the compulsory dance and the original dance. There were even rumors that Demetri had tried to seduce Rosalie Hale during the competition to distract her from her performance. The better part of the rumor was that Demetri had barely recovered from a well place knee to his family jewels to compete and win.

“Personally, I think it’s so unfair that they have to practice together,” I announced, having finished filling the sort of interested Emmett in on the soap opera that was ice dancing world. “Don’t you?”

“Yep. Sure.” Emmett leaned forward in his chair as the five teams skated onto the ice. “Who’s that?”

I knew who he was talking about, of course, but I couldn’t resist teasing him. I owed him for seventeen years of teasing me. “Who’s who?”

“The blonde girl in the black leggings and turquoise top thingy,” he explained vaguely.

“Tunic, the turquoise tunic,” I said, unable to resist the urge to drag him on a little longer. “That’s Rosalie Hale. Aren’t you glad I pestered you into coming with me?”

“Yes. You have tickets to everything else she’ll be at, right?”

I was laughing hard when I answered him. “Yep. But the compulsory dance already happened and the Hales placed first. But there’s still the original dance, more practice, and the free dance. I’ve got two tickets to all of them. Why? Did you want to come?”

“Hell, yeah. Mom can go watch curling or something. There isn’t anything I’d rather do than escort my little Pipsqueak to ice dancing.”

The fact that he’d said all that with a straight face had me dying in my seat. I couldn’t speak for wheezing, so I waited until I’d calmed down and then turned my attention to the ice. I couldn’t help but focus on one particular part of one particular skater – Jasper Hale’s ass in his black skating pants.

When the practice was finished, I grabbed Emmett’s elbow and pulled him out of his seat, towing him along behind me as I weaved through the small crowd and made for the exit. “Come on, Shrek, maybe we can catch them when they leave.”

Surprisingly, he picked up the pace. “Okay, Pipsqueak, I can stalk her for awhile,” he admitted bluntly. “Hey, you aren’t stalking her brother, what’s-his-name, are you? He’s too old for you, if you are.”

“His name is Jasper, yes I am, and no, he’s not,” I said, answering every question at once. “I’m almost eighteen, he’s almost twenty-one – we’re good. And you know, they’re twins so Rosalie’s almost the same age as you.”

That shut him up and I found us a prime spot right by the door that I’d already scoped out as the skater’s exit.

The Hales were the last to leave the arena, but I couldn’t have left even if I’d wanted to – Emmett wasn’t going anywhere. There were about twenty fans and a few press people gathered and they went along the line, signing autographs, posing for pictures, and answering questions. Emmett had moved us, by lifting me an inch off the ground by the back of my jacket and carrying me, to the end of the line to wait for them.

The moment Rosalie came into view, Emmett started flirting. She apparently didn’t mind a bit, making a beeline for him with Jasper close behind. That was, of course, just fine with me.

“Aren’t you Alice Cullen?” he asked, stopping in front me.

The fact that Jasper Hale knew who I was left me completely unable to do anything other than nod that I was Alice Cullen. I felt like an idiot, but it couldn’t really be helped.

“I remember your long program at Skate Canada,” Jasper continued. “It was really good, you should have at least placed third. Why didn’t you compete at Nationals last month? Jessica Stanley was telling one story, but I’m guessing you got hurt.”

If Emmett hadn’t had a grip on the back of my coat, I would have melted into a puddle right then and there. I’d competed in the ladies competition at Skate Canada after Whitney Lee was injured and a spot opened up. It’d been my first time competing at the senior level internationally and I’d been so nervous that I could hardly remember my how I’d skated. More importantly, Jasper Hale thought I deserved the bronze medal!

I knew the rumors that Jessica Stanley, the reigning US champion and all around frigid ice queen, was spreading about me. Edward, my sometimes idiot brother, had turned her down a half dozen times and she had it out for me. So she spread the rumor that I missed Nationals because I got knocked up by my coach. It wasn’t true at all. I’d slipped a disc in my back when I fell attempting a triple axel on what would forever be known as Black Friday in more ways than one to me.

I told Jasper about my injury and he reached over the barricade to hug me lightly. “Are you okay now? Will you be able to compete in the fall?”

“I hope so,” I said, hoping my voice sounded less like the nervous whisper to him than it did to me. “My dad’s an orthopedic surgeon, so I know I won’t screw up my recovery. I just hope I can jump again.”

“There’s always ice dancing if you can’t,” he offered. “I may be biased, but I think it’s harder than singles.”

I knew that Jasper had balanced a singles career with his ice dancing until three years earlier. He’d been good, too, and the skating world was shocked when he opted for the discipline that Americans never won. So I didn’t doubt he knew if dance or singles was harder. “I’ll remember that,” I promised.

“Come on, Jas,” Rosalie said, interrupting us. “We’ve got to go to that team meeting.”

“See you around, Alice?” Jasper asked as he followed his sister.

I giggled out what I hoped sounded like an agreement.

“Pipsqueak,” Emmett said, sighing deeply as he stood next to me, “do not let me miss the next thing that she is supposed to be at. Got it? I will be there.”

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

The original dance was the very next night.

“Are you going to complain until Rosalie skates?” I asked Emmett as we settled into our seats across the ice from the judges. We weren’t right on the ice, but about halfway up – the perfect location.

“No, I’ll be good because I know she’s coming,” he promised, winking at me. “When does she skate?”

“They skate second to last because they’re second after the compulsory dance,” I said. “And, just so you know, there is a theme of sorts to all the programs. Every team has to skate to music that is native to the country that they represent. So it might seem strange at times.”

“What’s Rosalie skating to?”

I could barely believe my ears. Emmett was actually taking an interest in skating beyond just the girls. Sort of. “Rosalie and Jasper are skating to Cherokee Morning Song. They even spent three weeks with the Cherokee Nation in Oklahoma to learn how they could incorporate traditional dancing into the program.”

I expected to have to keep waking him up, but I didn’t. He spent a lot of time playing Angry Birds his iPhone, but he stayed awake. Birds were completely forgotten when the Hales took the ice.

Their program was magical. Skating programs were usually fast and furious to up the difficulty level, but Jasper and Rosalie kept their program incredibly difficult while skating far more slowly to the exact pace of the music. Their scores vaulted them ahead of Canadian team that skated just before them. The only question was where Varniene and Kazlauskas would fit in.

They placed behind the Hales.

“I’m in love,” Emmett sighed as the seats around us emptied quickly.

I sighed too, accidentally imitating him. “Me too.”

“Come on, Pipsqueak, let’s see if there’s any chance we can talk to them,” he demanded, hopping to his feet and grabbing my hand.

“Aw, Shrek, did you get her phone number yesterday?” I groaned. “Are we supposed to meet them somewhere?”

“So what if I did?” he asked as we walked along the concourse. “You got the hots for Jasper and I like her. She just texted me and said to meet them in the same spot. Don’t you want to go?”

“Shut up and let’s go,” I muttered. I couldn’t let him know how excited I was by his forward, blunt nature in that moment – he’d gloat about it for weeks.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

The four of us ended up at the Medals Plaza. With embarrassing instructions that I stay where he could see me, Emmett the ogre wandered deep into the crowd with Rosalie. I was never big on crowds and I was a little worried that I’d get jostled and hurt my back again, so I hung on the fringes of the crowd. Jasper stayed by me.

“Would you like some hot chocolate?” he asked, gesturing toward the cart that was selling it. “It’s cold tonight.”

I said I did and walked with him to the buy it; he paid for mine and got a cup of his own. “Are you going to get in trouble with your coach for being out tonight?” I asked shyly.

Jasper shook his head and led me to a bench at the back of the crowd, sitting down only after I did. “No. Vladimir competed in the 1984 Olympics and the USSR team didn’t let them do much of anything. His theory is that we’ve trained enough; sitting in our hotel rooms or practicing extra now would be like cramming for a test – counterproductive. And then he muttered something about not seeing the Olympics making us grouchy in our old age. He’s so strange. Not to mention grouchy.”

I laughed and blew on my drink to cool it. “I’ve heard that about him.”

“Grouchy and strange or not, he’s pretty much a genius at what he does,” Jasper said, laughing as he sipped his hot chocolate. “I meant to ask you, is your father one of the Team USA doctors? It took me awhile, but I think I finally put all the pieces together.”

I smiled and nodded. “Yep. He’s working mostly with the luge, bobsleigh, and skeleton teams though.”

“My neighbors in the Athlete’s Village are both on the skeleton team and we made a deal that they’d come to the free dance if I went to the skeleton finals. Are you going?”

Butterflies promptly took flight in my stomach. I knew it wasn’t a date – my dad was the team doctor so it made sense that I might be going and Jasper had already promised to go, but he was still interested in whether or not I was going. “Um, yeah, I am,” I said, hoping I didn’t sound like a giggling schoolgirl. “I’ve always wanted to try skeleton, but I’m too small. And it’d probably give my coach and my parents aneurysms.”

Jasper’s smile and twinkling eyes turned the gentle swarm of butterflies into mad rush of beating wings. “Makes sense, I suppose,” he agreed. “Anyway, I don’t know if your father gets tickets or not, but I can get a guest pass with my ticket. If you want to come with me, that is.”

“Yeah, that’d be really great,” I said, still hoping I didn’t sound like a silly little girl. “Thank you.”

Emmett and Rosalie found us again a little while later; they’d already made plans to go to Whistler and watch some of the alpine skiing events after the ice dancing competition was finished. Emmett and I walked Jasper and Rosalie as close as we could get to the Athlete’s Village and then made our way back to our hotel. Edward, our sadly missing in action brother, was actually in the café in the lobby. He was still mooning over Bella as they had coffee and talked, but he’d been spotted. That was a definite improvement.

Emmett snickered as we stepped into the elevator. “He’s going to become a journalist just so he can hang out in the media centers with her, isn’t he?”

“Mom and Dad will be glad he finally picked something to do,” I deadpanned, giggling before I turned serious. “Shrek, Jasper bought me hot chocolate and offered me a guest pass to skeleton. Did he ask me on a date?”

Emmett faked a sniffle. “My little Pipsqueak is growing up. So sad. But seriously, yes, it is a date. You’ve spent too much time in an ice rink,” he said, shaking his head ruefully. “Being eighteen and having to ask your brother if you got asked out on a date, it’s just wrong.”

He was being annoying, but I didn’t care. Jasper Hale had asked me on a date! I didn’t even care that my parents were going to be there.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

I punched Emmett the next morning when he woke me up before nine. My hand hurt and I wanted to kick him for good measure, but then I remembered that we were going to watch the Hales practice for their free dance.

“She’s got a date,” Emmett explained to my gaping parents as I raced around the hotel room to get ready in record time. “Well, for skeleton later, but the guy’s practicing this morning.”

“And you’re going to watch ice dancing?” my dad asked, perhaps more shocked by that than how fast I was moving. “Again?”

“Yep,” I answered for him. “Shrek’s got it bad for my date’s sister slash partner. They’re going to skiing after she’s done competing.”

My mom was still speechless, so my dad was left to answer again. “Okay. Have fun.”

Edward rode down to the lobby with us, no doubt seeking about one Miss Bella Swan. “You two are strange,” he said, shaking his head as he leaned against the wall, “getting up early to go to ice dance practice. I never saw it coming, Em. Not from you.”

“This is rich,” Emmett groaned. “The stalker is calling us weird for supporting Team USA however we can. What’re we going to do about this, Pipsqueak?”

I winked at him and Edward promptly started begging us not to do anything. Emmett understood my wink and, when we got off the elevator, I put the plan into action. Bella was there – waiting for him, I could only imagine. I threw my arms around Edward and tried to keep a straight face. “Bye, Sexy Eddie,” I squealed, letting go of him and darting to Emmett’s side.

“Yeah, see ya later, Sex Ed!” he bellowed across the lobby.

The look on Edward’s face was priceless and, luckily, I captured it with my iPhone for all eternity. “We are in so much trouble, Shrek,” I laughed as we headed out into the cold Vancouver air.

“Two against one, Pipsqueak,” he assured me, laughing even harder, “we’ll never lose. Oh, and put that on Facebook right now.”

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

Emmett was weirdly entranced by the free dance practice, so I snapped a picture of his version of Edward mooning over Bella and put that on Facebook too. If there was one thing that was totally true about Alice Cullen, it was that she didn’t play favorites when it came to her brothers. They both knew it too – it was all good. I expected that there’d be a photo of me looking all dopey while Jasper practiced posted by the end of the day.

I watched everything, mostly to gauge what Jasper and Rosalie would need to do if they were going to capture the gold. Most of the other teams at that practice session, Tanya and Demetri included, ran through their programs at least twice, but the Hales didn’t. Instead, they picked out certain parts and ran through only those.

I knew the psychology of it perfectly. They wanted to make it clear that they weren’t worried about the competition, even if they were. It was strange that the Lithuanians didn’t do same.

The Hales even went so far as to leave practice early, motioning me and Emmett to follow them.

“Don’t they have family that should be hanging around instead of us?” Emmett wondered while we stood as close to the locker rooms as the burly security guard would allow. “Like parents or something?”

I shook my head. “They were orphaned when they were twelve,” I explained, making a mental note to never let Jasper know that I’d googled him rather extensively. “They lived with their grandfather, but he died four years ago. So no, no family. And don’t tell Rosalie that I told you all that. You either looked it up yourself or play dumb until she tells you.”

He saluted me. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Come on,” Rosalie said as she breezed out of the locker room. “A friend of mine told me about a coffee shop that’s pretty much undiscovered by the tourists and athletes. I need quiet and I need coffee.” She linked her arm through Emmett’s and led the way out of the arena.

Jasper shrugged, twirling his finger around his ear to silently tell me that he thought his sister was crazy. When I clapped my hand over my mouth to hold back a laugh, he bit his lip to do the same and held his hand out to me.

“You don’t have gloves?” he asked when I put my bare hand in his. “It’s freezing out.”

“I don’t think skaters feel the cold in their fingers so much after so much time in ice rinks,” I said, hoping he wouldn’t make Rosalie give me gloves – I liked holding his hand. “You don’t have gloves either.”

“Touché,” he allowed, holding the door open for me. “Did you want go for coffee or go somewhere else? They seem like they have more private in mind.”

Rosalie’s hand had dropped to Emmett’s ass and his hand was venturing away from her shoulder and toward her chest. It seemed caffeine and serenity weren’t all that she needed.

“Yeah, we should leave them alone,” I agreed warily. “I don’t have any ideas about where to go, though, and you’re the one who has to compete tomorrow, so you pick.”

“We’ll go to the coffee shop. They can go where they like. Just not to my room!” he yelled as Rosalie and Emmett wandered away. When I looked at him curiously, he shrugged. “I don’t have a roommate, she does. And a key to my room. I think it’s pretty clear what they’re going to be doing.”

We went to the coffee shop, making small talk along the way, and were both happy to discover that it was relatively undiscovered by tourists and athletes alike. I led the way to a small table in a corner that was walled with shelves filled with old books. “Is this okay?” I asked nervously, wondering if perhaps had been right and I had spent too much time in an ice rink.

“Yep, nice and private,” he agreed. “What kind of coffee do you want?”

He refused to let me insist on paying, I claimed it was only fair since he’d bought my hot chocolate, and ended up buying me a peppermint mocha.

It was a little bit more than small talk while we drank our mochas. The only rule Jasper insisted on was that we not talk about skating in any form. It was an easy enough rule to abide by. It turned out that we had many, many things in common. So we talked about books, movies, music, and then we went through each other’s wallets on the theory that you could learn a lot about someone by doing that.

“You’re very neat,” I complimented him when I’d finished my inventory of his wallet. “But I saw you slip something out before you gave it to me, that’s cheating.”

“It was a, um, condom,” Jasper said, dropping his eyes to his cup as his cheeks reddened. “I, uh, didn’t want you to get the, um, wrong idea.”

I put my head down on the table and tried not to groan too loudly.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

Our impromptu date ended better than it was at that moment. We ended up staying until Rosalie and Emmett came looking for us. Given the state of disarray they both arrived in, there had been no hidden condoms between them.

I was up at the crack of dawn the next morning, bouncing nervously on the sofa bed that I slept on in the suite I shared with my parents.

“You do know you’re not the one competing, right?” my dad asked as he poured himself coffee. “And, before you ask, given the amount you’re bouncing already, you can’t have any coffee.”

I scowled at him and made a beeline to get my own coffee. “I know I’m not competing, but if Jasper doesn’t do well, he might think I’m bad luck,” I whined, snatching at a sugar packet before he could hide them from me. “What would I do then?”

“Do about what?” my mom asked as she emerged from the bathroom.

“Don’t ask, Esme,” my dad warned her. “Unless it’s a ‘girl thing’, I really wouldn’t recommend asking.”

I stuck my tongue out and took my coffee into the bathroom, stealing the shower before he had a chance to protest. As I shut the door, I heard my mom declare that I was in love. My dad replied that he was going to ask Emmett to keep a close eye on me. Little did he know about what Emmett preferred to keep a close eye on.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

Once again, it was only Emmett and I that went to watch the ice skating. Our dad was on duty at the moguls event and Bella was covering women’s ice hockey so Edward had naturally followed her there.

The last group of teams to skate had just left their warm-ups when my phone buzzed in my pocket.

I see you in the stands. Kiss me for good luck?

I looked down at the area near the kiss and cry. Jasper saw me and put his phone to his lips. I laughed and copied him, kissing my phone and earning strange looks from Emmett and the woman sitting on the other side of me.

It vibrated again while it was against my lips.

Thanks. I hoped you would do that. No pressure or anything, but do you want to be my girlfriend? Text YES or NO.

The squeal I let out earned stranger looks than kissing the phone had.

YES. Of course.

I could see his smile from my seat.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

Jasper and Rosalie, they were no longer simply the Hales to me, skated last, just after Varniene and Kazlauskas got sort of presumptuous and performed a program to Beethoven’s Ode to Joy. The Lithuanians scored high and vaulted into first place.

My stomach literally ached in two minutes it took for Jasper and Rosalie to begin their program. I knew Emmett felt the same when I glanced over and saw that his knuckles were white as he gripped the armrests on his chair.

“Can Rosalie win?” he asked, leaning close to me as the crowd roared over Varniene and Kazlauskas’ scores. “Honest opinion, Pipsqueak, can it happen?”

“I don’t know, Shrek,” I moaned pitifully. “I hope so. Honest, I do, but I don’t know. The new scoring systems are supposed to keep out any chances of favoritism, but we’ll see.”

Emmett, ever the softie at heart, blew Rosalie a kiss when she glanced our way.

Jasper and Rosalie skated to Hans Zimmer’s 160 BPM from the Angels & Demons soundtrack. It wasn’t classic ice dancing music by any means, but it worked for them. It was edgy and new, something that wasn’t all that common ice dancing. In other words, they’d have to skate perfectly to convince the judges.

And they did skate perfectly.

I hopped out of my chair before they finished, Emmett right beside me.

It took the longest time for the scores to come up. My stomach went from aching to outright hurting. I didn’t want to think about how Jasper felt just then.

In the end, though, Jasper and Rosalie defeated Varniene and Kazlauskas, becoming the first Americans to ever win ice dancing gold at the Olympics.

Rosalie cried on the podium, I cried in the stands, Jasper blinked a lot on the podium, and I heard Emmett sniffle next to me.

It was very strange, indeed.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

I didn’t get to see Jasper much over the next couple days because of the press and promotional things he had to do, but we did finally meet up properly at the skeleton event as promised.

Thankfully, my parents didn’t embarrass me when I introduced them to Jasper. They just congratulated him and told us to have fun.

“So do I get to be nervous watching you skate in Sochi in four years?” Jasper asked as we found our seats in the stands.

“You’re quitting!” I exclaimed. “Sorry, but probably not. My dad and the other doctors aren’t sure that my back could hold up to another injury like that.”

He put his arm around me and hugged me gently. “I don’t really want to quit, but Rosalie does. Well, she is.” His foot was bouncing nervously as he tried to figure out how to say whatever it was that he wanted to say. “I hope this doesn’t come out wrong, since you’ve only just agreed to be my girlfriend, but do you want to try ice dancing?”

“Me? Ice dance?” I thought I knew what he was asking, but I had to be sure.

“Yeah, with me,” he clarified, proving I knew what he was trying to say. “Rosalie’s quitting and I don’t want to. You aren’t sure about going back to singles. So why not try ice dancing with me? There aren’t any jumps and the lifts aren’t as dangerous as pairs. I could teach you.”

“We’d be spending every moment together,” I pointed out. The very thought made me a little bit giddy.

“Mm-hmm,” Jasper hummed. “There’s that added bonus. You can think about it, if you want. You don’t need to answer now.”

“It can’t hurt, can it? Let’s do it.” I grinned at him, my eyes widening in surprise when he leaned close and kissed me.

==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==/==\\==

“SHREK!” I screamed, bounding into my brother’s hotel and room and pouncing on him.

“‘Sup, Pipsqueak?” he asked lazily, moving his laptop before I broke it.

“Jasper kissed me, I’m going back to skating, I’m going to try ice dancing with Jasper, and Rosalie’s quitting.” I took a deep breath and scooted off his lap. “Did you get all that?”

“Yep,” he said, laughing. “And, aside from the kissing bit, I know Rosalie’s quitting and I knew Jasper was going to talk to you about that. He kissed you?”

I laughed at Emmett’s narrowed, suspicious eyes. “Do you think Jasper did that after what you did with Rosalie?”

“Shhh!” he hissed, clamping his paw-like hand over my mouth. “Mom’s in the bathroom.”

I licked his palm and scrambled away from him. “Aren’t you glad I pestered you into going to ice dancing practice?”

Puffing out his chest and cringing like what he was about to say would surely be painful, he nodded. “Yeah, Pipsqueak, I am. Thank you. But now,” he said, shakily his head sadly, “we must focus on sibling retribution. Edward was at the ice dancing finals and got a picture of me with a drop of water on my cheek during the medal’s ceremony. He posted it on Facebook. He must pay.”

Drop of water on his cheek? I’d let him pretend that if he needed to, but he’d never live it down.

“Come on, Shrek,” I said, pulling him off the bed. “I’ve got just the thing to get back at Edward…”

THE END

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